


Give It A Chance

by Eternal Scribe (Shadowcat)



Category: Young Riders
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-18
Updated: 2011-01-18
Packaged: 2017-10-14 22:48:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/154307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowcat/pseuds/Eternal%20Scribe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was about to lose her and he had never seen it coming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Give It A Chance

  
On a night like this, where the sky was clear and you could see all of the stars you could imagine, you most certainly did not expect to get bad news.

"She's leaving us."

Jimmy had been aware that it was Buck that was coming up behind him, so it wasn't his arrival that had caused him to tense. He forced himself to loosen his his fists and move his hand from his gun to the railing in front of him. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched as Buck came up beside him and leaned into the railing.

"What are you talking about? Rachel isn't going anywhere. She likes it here."

Buck shook his head. "Not Rachel, Jimmy. _Lou_. Lou is leaving."

He hadn't felt anything like this since the time he had been forced to kill Lou's father to save her. He shook his head and turned to look at Buck. "What?"

He wasn't about to ask how Buck knew about this and he didn't. Buck and Lou were very close friends -- both feeling at times that they didn't belong, he reckoned -- and if she would tell anyone what she was thinking it would be him.

 _But didn't it used to be you that she told everything to?_

Buck sighed, looking at his face and then looking back over towards the shadows of the horse corral.

"I heard her talking with Rachel. She was wondering what kind of job she might be able to get somewhere so she could afford her own place."

"Why would she want to do a fool thing like that?"

Buck was quiet for so long that Jimmy wanted to shake him, but finally his friend sighed deeply.

"Lou has a lot of pain inside her, Jimmy. She hides it really well, but I've seen it. I guess it's because I understand what she's thinking and how it feels not to completely belong."

"Don't say that. This is where both you and Lou belong! With your friends and your family. This is your damned home, the both of you!"

"Jimmy," Buck said patiently. "You asked. I'm trying to explain to you without betraying a friend."

Jimmy clenched his jaw, but nodded. He had the feeling that he wasn't going to like what he was told.

"Lou loves deeply and right now, she's decided that she has to leave the station because she's not in love with Kid." His eyes shifted from the corral and then back to Jimmy. "Kid knows. She told him. He asked her to stay."

"So why isn't she?"

"Because the man she's in love with..."

"Who hurt her, Buck? I'll kill him."

Buck laughed, but there was no humor in it. "You did, Jimmy."

Jimmy turned in his tracks to stare at his friend. "Excuse me? I haven't done anything to Lou!" Hell, he'd rip out his own insides before he did anything to hurt her.

"That is the problem right there, Jimmy," Buck said quietly. "Lou is in love with you and you keep her at a distance."

"I don't want her getting hurt!"

"She already has a history of hurt that she's dealt with and survived, Jimmy."

"All the more reason for me to make sure she doesn't have to deal with anymore pain coming from my direction."

"You're breaking her heart," Buck said quietly.

Jimmy's eyes widened and then he shook his head. "You're seeing things that aren't there, Buck. We're friends, that's all."

"I'm seeing even more, and she also told me, Jimmy. Her feelings are there for anyone to see. All the boys know, as does Teaspoon and Rachel. You're the only one that's been blind." Buck turned to go back into the house. "Jimmy? You have until tomorrow to make a decision. "I told Lou I'd go with her if she wanted to really leave. We leave in the morning."

"Where is she, Buck?" There was no way that he was letting Buck ride away with Lou. He couldn't let that happen.

Buck looked over his shoulder. "Where does she go when she needs to think alone?" Buck let him think on that and went back into the bunkhouse.

Jimmy stayed standing on the porch as he thought about what Buck had said. Where did Lou like to go when she needed to be alone and --

He shook his head. The watering hole. That big body of water that was sheltered buy all of the trees and she could remain undisturbed there for as long as she felt she needed to. Well, tonight, he was going to disturb her solitude. If what Buck told him was right, then he had no choice but to do so.

It didn't take him long to reach the watering hole, and only a little longer to find her exact hiding spot. Sighing, he walked quietly up to where she was sitting. When she didn't saying, he sat down next to her.

"Buck says you're thinking of leaving the express and possibly Sweetwater."

She nodded, not turning to look at him. "Reckon it's time it happens. I can't stay here forever."

"But this is your home, Lou. We're your family."

"I know, but I can't do this any longer, Jimmy. I just can't stay where the one person I want to be around doesn't want me. It hurts too much."

"Is that why you started talking to Buck about everything instead of me? I thought were were closer than that, Lou."

Lou let out a heavy sigh. "I'll never be one of those fancy blonds in the pretty dresses, Jimmy. I'll never be one of those girls that can't talk about anything besides fashion and how much money their daddy can bring in. I'll never be one of those girls and I'll never fit in -- no matter what clothes I happen to be wearing."

"Aw, Lou. You're better than any of those girls. They have a hard time with any kind of real thing that comes into their lives."

"Yeah, but that's the kind of gal you seem to have flock around you, Jimmy. I can't ever be that kind of girl and I'm tired of feeling my heart bleed every time I watch all of the dancing and the parties." She sighed, looking down at the ground between her boots. "I can't ever be the kind of girl you like, Jimmy. So, leaving seems like the best thing to do because I can't take loving someone I ain't never gonna be good enough for."

Jimmy started to argue, but one of the things she said cause his brain to stop and his jaw to drop. Did Lou just say that she loved him?

Lou shrugged, looking back over the water. "So, I talked to Buck and he and I are leaving tomorrow. We'll find a place to start over that has nothing to do with the Express. I'll write everybody so that I know that I'm okay, but I just can't do this any longer, Jimmy. I can't stand back and watch you with those girls that don't give a damn about who you really are. I can't watch you get taken in by a bit of lace and an empty head who will use you for as long as you're an instant status symbol and then leave you somewhere." She ducked her head. "I can't, and I won't."

Jimmy was quiet for several moments as he tried to find the right words -- words that Lou needed to hear. He had never been good at these kinds of conversations, but he knew he had to make this one right or he was going to lose someone very dear to him.

He reached over and took her hand in his. "Louise, those aren't the kind of girls I'm interested in for any future of mine. They can't keep a serious thought in their heads beyond the next party and how many men I've killed."

"You sure spend a lot of time with them."

"Because I've been hard-headed and didn't realize there was a better kind of woman that wanted to spend time with me."

"You keep telling me that it's too dangerous to be close to you and that's the biggest load of shit I have ever heard."

"I didn't know you were serious about me, Lou. I mean, as far as I knew, you were Kid's girl."

"Kid wants me to be something I'm not and put me in a cage of his making. I'm not that kind of girl, Jimmy. I never have been and I don't want to be."

"Lou, don't leave in the morning."

She turned to look at him, one eyebrow raised.

"I don't know how all of this is going to settle out, but I'm asking you to please not leave."

"Are you saying you're willing to give us a try?"

"I'm saying that I think I love you, too, Lou, but I've never felt like this before. I don't like admitting it, either. So, give me a chance to work this out with us and give me a chance not to screw things up even more." He tugged her closer to him so that he could look down into her face. "Don't go, Lou, because I really don't know what I would do without you here."

Lou was silent for a moment and then she nodded, looking up into his eyes. "I'll stick around for now," she promised.

"Good," he said in relief. "I just need some time."

  
When Buck came to check on them some time later, it was to see the two of them curled close together and it looked liked Jimmy was kissing Lou to within an inch of her life. He smiled as he silently walked away. It didn't look like he and Lou were taking a trip after all.

  



End file.
